Blarticles

Now you can view all of my writing in one place! Visit my website:

http://www.meganridge.com/blarticles.html

elephant journal

Check out my article about the importance of boundaries on elephant journal! 

http://www.elephantjournal.com/2014/05/the-importance-of-boundaries-for-yoga-teachers-megan-ridge-morris/

This One's A Doozy

Dear Friends In Yoga,

I had a dream about my mom last night-- one of those dreams that seemed to last the whole night.  I remember feeling guilty and weirdly foolish because I thought she had died some time ago, but she was, in fact, alive.  She was speaking normally, but she still had a brain tumor and it was still growing and she was still going to die soon.  And I felt sad all over again, reliving all that pain again.  My mind can go to very dark places.  I thank my new favorite goddess, Kali, for that.  

Two years ago today, some of you may recall that my dad and I were just finishing up giving antivirals to mom through her PICC line 3x/day, which had temporarily reduced the swelling in her brain believed to be caused by viral encephalitis (she was misdiagnosed).  She was heading back to work, feeling clearer minded and grateful to be alive.  She was the happiest I'd seen in a long time.  May showed a very steady decline.  She was depressed and frustrated through most of June.  July 3rd's MRI finally revealed the tumor and brain surgery was July 5th.  She showed slight improvement for a few weeks after surgery, and then her motor skills started to decline rapidly when radiation/chemo started.  August was the true start (at least for me) of accepting her approaching death.  I watched her deteriorate for 8 months.  It was excruciating long while we were in the middle of it.  She was in a wheelchair and couldn't speak at my wedding, which is still very painful for me to think about.  I struggle with my own guilt.  How did it not occur to me from March to July (4 months!) that she might have a brain tumor?  If we had demanded a MRI sooner than the doctors recommended, would she still be with us now?  Would she have danced at my wedding?  Could she have held her future grand baby?  My logical brain understands that Glioblastoma is still too aggressive for modern medicine.  It would have killed her anyway, but maybe not right away.  I can run all of this through my mind in a matter of seconds.  It's a toxic tape.

A year ago today, mom was in hospice and I was spending her final days with her, sitting by her bed, sometimes lying with her in bed, mostly in silence.  She wasn't talking anymore, but sometimes I would talk, hoping she could hear me and understand my loving words.  I sang to her.  I read "Harry Potter" to her and eventually worked up the courage to read her eulogy to her. I was doing my best to say goodbye to my mother.  And she couldn't say goodbye back.  I think she may have tried once or twice.  She just couldn't get the words out.  The love I received from her throughout our 28 years together is more than most children get.  I am beyond grateful for that, and I can't blame myself for wanting more time with her, or at least wanting a proper goodbye.  With a mom that awesome, who wouldn't want more?

The first anniversary of her death is April 9th, and I must confess, I spent most of this past year checked-out.  The mind is so good at rationalizing, it can be dangerous for the soul.  But my soul was so desperate for healing, it finally spoke louder than my denial.  So Kali, "the mother goddess," lead me into the darkness of my dreams because the outcome was light and liberation.  When I woke, I cried and cried and cried.  I let some of the guilt go and felt a little lighter after some genuine processing.  I know that I must ultimately accept what happened and forgive myself for not knowing all the answers.  I did absolutely everything I could with the knowledge I had at the time.  I can't change the past and I am the only one who can free myself of present guilt.  Every day we are met with a choice-- to dwell in the darkness or to move through it and bravely step into our light.  

Mom was a lighting designer and always noticed the way light played.  I know she's around when the sun shines on me, when rainbows appear, when the stars are bright, and when crystals reflect brilliant color.  I know that these goddesses help light and illuminate my path so that I may walk brightly through this world.  I have been imagining my mom a lot lately, smiling at me, soothingly repeating, "You're okay.  I'm okay.  Everything will be okay."  Like she now knows something I don't, and when I know it, I'll be constantly smiling too.  

I want to be my best self to honor her memory and to prove to myself that anything is possible with dedication and consistent practice.  I commit to staying connected and awake to my process of deep healing.  You can count on that and hold me to it.  

What will you commit to today?

With gratitude,

Megan

Mark your calendar now for a yoga fundraising event happening on May 17th!  This event is in honor of my mother and all of the proceeds will benefit local brain tumor patients in need of financial assistance.  

Check out my updated bio and current class schedule!

My next breathing class is April 6th from 4-6pm at the Yoga Loft.

Our next Off the Mat Lehigh Valley meeting is April 14th, 7:30-8:30pm at Wegmans Cafe on 512.  We are discussing some exciting events!  Newbies welcome anytime...

Our annual "Doga" classes (yoga with your dog!) are happening on April 26th at the Paws at the Promenade event!  Half hour classes are at 1:30 and 2:15pm.  Bring a towel, treats, and your favorite pup. All proceeds benefit SunRays Pit Bull Rescue.

Thank you for putting me on the 2014 Happening List!  "Yoga with Megan" WON!!

Routine

Dear Friends In Yoga,

My dog loves routine.  He craves it.  If he could predict what was going to happen next all the time he'd be set.  Humans are different.  We're afraid we're going to miss out on something amazing if we're always doing the same old thing, and many times we do.  So we ditch the routine as much as we deem feasible at any given point in our lives-- cut out the gym, the yoga class, the home cooked meal, for an out of the ordinary experience!  And before we know it, we are so overwhelmed by our extraordinary experiences that we go back to the daydream of a routine that would make life simple again-- at the very least-- minimize the stress of scheduling.  Why can't we make up our minds?  Maybe because it's the very act of swinging between routine and spontaneity that keeps life manageable, and interesting.

I am currently in the "craving routine" phase.  And I must confess, since the implementation of my new routine, I am feeling SO MUCH BETTER!!!  It's no surprise.  Making time for me and making my health a priority should really be non-negotiable.  I know I'm better off for it, as are all of the people that come in contact with me.  So now the grocery store runs and yoga classes are in my calendar and I will not budge!  I hope to see you in my class (or maybe practicing beside you in someone else's) soon!

With gratitude,
Megan

My Weekly Class Schedule:

Monday...6-7:15pm...Gentle/Level 1...The Yoga Loft

Tuesday...9:45-11am...Level 1...The Yoga Loft

Wednesday...9:15-10:30am...Gentle...The Yoga Loft

Wednesday...4-5pm...Gentle...Inspired By You

Wednesday...6-7:15pm...Gentle/Level 1...The Yoga Loft

Thursday...9:45-10:30am...Level 1...The Yoga Loft

Friday...9:15-10:30am...The Yoga Loft

My next breathing class is Sunday, March 16th, 4-6pm. 

Our next Off the Mat Lehigh Valley meeting is Monday, March 10th from 7:30-8:30pm at Wegman's upstairs cafe on 512.

Mark your calendars to attend these upcoming fundraisers:

April 26th - "Doga Classes" Yoga with your dog!  At the Paws on the Promenade event.  Choose from 2 half hour class times: 1:30 or 2:15pm.  This is a donation based fundraiser to benefit SunRays Pit Bull Rescue!

May 17th - The Brain Tumor Foundation of the Lehigh Valley Yoga Class fundraiser!  $1 massages, raffle, and class will take place between the hours of 1-4pm.  

December Newsletter

Dear Friends in Yoga,

The holidays are upon us!  There are many things that I love about this time of year, but by the end of December, I often feel stressed by my busier schedule.  I'm going to do my best to curb stress this month by sticking to my regular routine.  I've recently started running and notice my ego creeping in, saying, "It's the holiday season!  You don't have to run.  Pick it back up in the New Year..."  That perspective is very tempting, but definitely not what's best for me.  My yoga practice reminds me to let go of what no longer serves me (my ego) to make space for what's best for me (healthy choices!).  I commit to keeping up with my yoga practice, running, and especially commit to celebrating old and new holiday traditions to the fullest.

I hope to see you on the mat!

With gratitude,

Megan Ridge Morris

November Newsletter

Dear Friends In Yoga,

This year has brought much joy and pain. It's only November, and I already find myself wishing away 2013.  I realize I need a shift in perspective!

I find it interesting that many of us associate the upcoming holidays with an opportunity to practice more gratitude, giving, and transformation.  What if, instead of celebrating these acts on selective dates, we engaged in loving ourselves and the world every day?  Daily gratitude can lead to daily giving, which often leads to transformation on scales both large and small.

This month, I commit to treating every day as though it were Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years combined!  Instead of looking to the unknown future for happiness, I will use present time to "just be" with family and friends, giving a receiving love for the sake of it, and remain open to whatever a new day may bring.  It is always within our power to choose how we feel and when we feel like our power is slipping away, getting on the mat can help us restore it.  Are you itching for a shift?  If so, I hope to see you on the mat this month!

With gratitude,
Megan

6 Months Ago

Six months ago today, my mom died of brain cancer.  Sometimes it feels like yesterday.  Usually it feels like it's been years.  I am still occasionally surprised by a myriad of raw emotions at any random moment.  These moments remind me that nothing is permanent.  

Before mom died, I had become comfortable with looking at my life from an orderly lens. It was easier for me to give my loved ones labels and define my worth in certain terms.  My system kept things manageable and under the illusion of control.  Today, without compartmentalizing, I am more susceptible to vulnerability.  I am grateful for the opportunity to explore this aspect of myself.  These days, when I have a hurricane in my belly or my heart starts thumping out of my chest, I know it's time to go through my fear instead of around it. 

My mom's life and death taught me that my true path is before me and it is also within me.  I need to stay quiet and open so that I can listen to my heart better.  Then I can walk the path with clarity and trust that the rest is unfolding as it will for my soul's evolution.  Mom taught me long ago that choosing gratitude would never fail me.  Her destiny woke me up and I will be forever grateful.

Tattoo

Dear Friends In Yoga,

I recently got a tattoo on my left forearm in honor of my mother.  It's a beautiful sun that reminds me of all of the suns mom collected over the years, along with the words, "como el río."  It means "like the river" or "as the river," in Spanish, a language that I am quickly falling in love with.

Paulo Coehlo wrote, "Como el Río que Fluye."  In the book, he compares the flowing of a river to a human life.  There are areas of a river (or times in our lives) that are stuck & still and areas that are moving rapidly.  Rivers support growth, provide shelter, and absorb warm sunlight.  Some rivers join oceans, some dry up for centuries.  The river chooses it's path as often as possible, but there are also uncontrollable forces that shift our path-- natural and personal disasters.  All things must eventually die in order for our planet to evolve, and some of us fearfully and fiercely resist this truth.  For myself, I aspire to always be "like the river"~ content with change, yet never surrendering my power of choice.

Mom is with me in my memory.  And my most vivid memories of her will help influence my future choices.  Her light, the sun, will always shine on me, the flowing river.  And the image on my arm is a nice reminder of all that.

Pray for Magic

Dear Friends In Yoga,

When I truly accept that certain patterns in my life are no longer working, and I can't see a solution for the problems at hand, I pray for transformation and guidance.  I pray for magic.  I usually don't know who I'm praying to, but I know that the act of praying can bring some relief; quieting the body and mind for a moment.  In those connected moments, when I give myself just enough time to turn inward, magic happens. Sometimes the shift is immediate, sometimes it takes a few days, weeks, even years, but these magical moments make me feel like the universe must have been listening to my prayer because the answer can be so coincidental or meaningful that there's no other explanation for it.

In reality, when we pray for magic, we are asking for the power to shift something at will. That's all "magic" is and we do it every day. We have the power to shift our perspective at will, whenever we choose. Then we can start to see our past stories as little allegories of gratitude and view our current fears and disconnected places as opportunities for growth. It is our own soul that shines differently because we decided to make a change. 

Magic isn't easy work, but it's worth it.  When we can finally recognize that a "problem" is a gift in disguise or that a feeling is "just a feeling," we are free.  And free to start the process all over again, at any moment. 

See you on the mat,

Megan Morris :-)

Summer Lovin'

Dear Friends in Yoga,

I have returned from my Italian honeymoon!  It was an illuminating, healing, rejuvenating trip.  My husband, Christopher, and I have been together for almost 10 years (married last October), but we had never before taken a long trip like this, just the two of us.  I think we communicated very well and we both truly cherished the many opportunities for deep connection.  Italy is a romantic place, for sure!  We stayed in Chianti and visited the surrounding Tuscan towns, spent a few nights in Cinque Terre, Florence and Venice.  The most challenging moments involved getting from one place to another.  More than once, I needed to practice some yogic breathing techniques to stay calm on the winding, narrow roads that hugged steep cliffs.  There was one particularly challenging day on the way to Cinque Terre.  We spent about 1.5 hours driving on a very scary road, only to find out that there was a landslide in October of 2011 that destroyed the part of the road that would allow us to reach our village.  We had to turn around, drive the 1.5 hours back, get on the highway, and enter from the other side of the mountain.  What should have been a 3 hour car ride turned into 6 hours.  There was a point in the drive where I became emotional (a combination of exhaustion, fear of falling off a cliff in a 2 ton vehicle and the extreme need to pee!) and Christopher immediately stepped up in my moment of panic.  I think that's something we've gotten better at over the years.  When one of us freaks out, the other calms down considerably, maintaining balance in chaos.  He did that for me beautifully in Italy, and I know I do it for him regularly.  I like to think of these moments as "Partner Yoga" at it's finest.  :-)

I am back to my regular teaching schedule today!  I hope to see you all in class.  The air conditioning at the Yoga Loft is working perfectly, so don't fear the heat!!!

Videos!

I've created a new page on my website called "Videos."  Included you'll find a chant to help you remember the 8 limbs of yoga in order, stages to pincha myrasasana, a sequence building up to Sun Salutation A, a seva fundraising video, and my lastest video: variations of tree pose!  CLICK HERE to check it out!

Happy Mother's Day!

Dear Friends In Yoga,

Last May, I didn't think it would be my last Mother's Day with mom around.  I have joined the ranks of people that must find a way to move through a day that would be much better spent with a talking, breathing, human mom but no longer have that privilege.  I always enjoyed Mother's Day growing up, and of course, now I feel like I could have done even more to honor mom's beauty every day of my life.  So what to do to honor her this year?  I thought about buying a star in her name, being that she loved observing light and especially marveled at a brilliant night sky.  But after further investigation, I have a feeling mom would prefer that my money, time and effort be put towards a worthy cause instead.  So on this Mother's Day, I'm going to honor mom by "symbolically adopting a bird" from the National Aviary.  And after that, I'm going to take a long walk and enjoy the beauty of nature.  At dusk, I'm going to sit in my living room with the windows open, a glass of Fetzer Chardonnay in hand, a plate of sliced extra sharp cheddar cheese by my side, and listen to some Elton John with the volume up high.  Because that seems authentic to who mom was and represents the kind of things we enjoyed doing together as mother and daughter.  I encourage you, no matter what your story may be, to celebrate Mother's Day the best way that you know how to this year, whether mom's been gone a long time, or she's still able to physically be with you today.  No matter what, you can celebrate her spirit, because she lives in you.  

Happy Mother's Day!

XO

Megan

Spirit

My beautiful mother became an angel on April 9th. Thank you all for your outpouring of support, kindness and love over the past 13 months. It was the hardest year of my life, and I am thankful for all of it. At one of the last classes I taught in March, a student I have known well for the past 5 years came up to me and said, "You know that all of the energy your mom is losing is going directly into you, right?" I instantly knew what she meant. I am so thankful for the numerous gifts mom gave me throughout my life and find that this new gift of a clear, strong connection to her Spirit feels both magical and overwhelming at times. My mom's journey with brain cancer has influenced my teaching and the way that I approach my own yoga practice in ways I never could have imagined. Ultimately, I now know with certainty that mom will be with me forever, and that brings me some genuine peace.

I took a break from everything to be with my family for almost three weeks and am looking forward to resuming my regular teaching schedule this Friday, April 19th. I hope to see you soon! Also, my next Learn to Breathe workshop is THIS SUNDAY, 4-6pm at the Loft. Click here to register.

With so much gratitude,

Megan

Dreams...

Dear Friends in Yoga,

I've been thinking a lot lately about a dream I had about six years ago, around the time that I graduated from college.  I'm standing in the middle of the parking lot across the street from my parents' house. It's dark outside and all of the first floor lights are on. The front door is wide open. A young girl, maybe ten, is standing outside. I start to head for the front door and, without speaking, the girl indicates that I shouldn't enter from the front, but that I should follow her around to the back. I feel a sense of danger, and know it would be smart to follow the girl. By the time I get around back, the girl has vanished. I go through the back door and my dad is standing inside, crying, and I instantly know he's crying because my mother just died. He looks terrible, lost, defeated and withering away. I turn to my left to see that the coat closet is completely empty except for a little boy that's sitting on the floor, maybe six years old. A bare bulb bathes the closet with light. The boy looks up and says to me, "Everyone must try to lick the spoon." And I wake up.


I've always interpreted the dream as "growing pains," letting go of dependence and trying my chance at life.  Now, six years later, I'm seeing it in a whole new way. One day soon, my dad will move out of the home he shared with his wife of 37 years, and the coat closet will be empty. A new family will inhabit the space and their kids will soon call it their "childhood home," just as I do. My dad may weep in that very same spot in the back of the house. He probably already has.  I'll stand bewildered, not knowing what to do, not able to understand the messages being sent to me.  Was my mom in that brightly lit living room?  Was the girl me?  If I fell asleep tonight and could have that dream all over again, I would thank that sweet little girl for trying to shield me from my pain, and then I would walk straight through the front door and see whatever it is I'm supposed to witness.

Yoga is getting me through this.  I see how my practice has allowed me the space to handle the hardest moments with grace and compassion.  Yoga is why I will eventually accept whatever will come because I know it's necessary for my soul's evolution.  I don't need an unhealthy coping mechanism to keep me safe right now because I want to use this time of family crisis and tragedy to grow in ways unimaginable to my human mind.  I'm the lucky one that gets to keep living and I owe it to my mother and to myself to live and love on a new level.  I want to dive in and be connected at all times, even if it means I will feel pain.  Imagine the possibilities that come from staying present at the most difficult time in your life.  Imagine not being afraid to feel, not afraid to stand in the presence of great change and say, "YES!"  Simply, yes. We are open, ready and willing. That is powerful.  We just have to stay connected.

With so much gratitude,

Megan

Love

Dear Friends in Yoga,

Extraordinary transformation is available to us all.  All we have to do is ask for it.  For me, change is possible when I apply what I've learned from my yoga practice to life's most challenging moments.  There are a lot of things I've done that I'm proud of, and many times that I absolutely succumbed to impulsive action.  I know that every experience was necessary for the purpose of growth and transformation.

In the past, I felt comfortable and in control because nothing in my life was that uncomfortable or out-of-control.  Now, I'm in the midst of a true test.  I'm up against my deepest fears, and see that fear is the only thing that holds me back from complete self-love and love of others.  These days I'm willing to test the boundaries of my fear and see what's possible because I realize that every moment holds the opportunity to make a loving choice.  That is the privilege and the burden of being human.  We are granted these amazing minds and bodies that make living in the world both a blessing and a curse.  We flip between feelings of lightness & darkness all the time, so perhaps the best place to land is in the blended gray of acceptance.  We're here.  We're together.  We're all just doing the best we can on our own, unique, transformational paths.  It's what makes us the same.

The decision to love in all moments isn't an easy one.  It takes consistent consciousness and commitment.  We must experience genuine authenticity as individuals before we can begin to heal as a global collective.  We must search our own hearts before we can sincerely share time and space with another's.  The trick is in remembering that this journey of self-inquiry and self-improvement will last a lifetime.  We may forgive today and find we must forgive again tomorrow.  And every time we choose freedom from fear, all that remains is love.

With gratitude,

Megan Ridge Morris

Yogathon & Silent Auction!

To Do List

I can sense that I'm playing on the edge of burn out, and it's only as I write this message that I remember how dangerous this game can be.  When we have too many things going on, it's easy to become ruled by our "tasks."  The overwhelming need to complete these tasks usually becomes stressful, which translates into the body as tension. I know from personal experience and from the multitude of reports that I get from my students daily, that once we are accustomed to "busyness," it's nearly impossible to pull ourselves away from it.  We essentially become addicted to the things that make us feel useful and progressive in a culture that constantly rewards productivity.  We become addicted to our tension.  The scary question I try pose to myself every day is, "Who am I without my to-do list?"  If I strip myself of all responsibilities and abandon all of my labels- daughter, fiance, teacher, friend- what is left?  What if I surrender all of my stress, tension, fear, guilt and shame so I can truly sit in the seat of my heart?  The authentic essence of who we are is always within us- it is the light we talk about in the yoga practice and the light that we strive to recognize in each other, even in our darkest moments.  When we are living in our own truth and light, it's much easier to see other people's light.  It may come in glimpses, minutes, hours... whoa, sometimes it even lasts the whole morning!  And when we are in these moments of clarity, there is love and compassion towards our own souls and all beings.  We officially let go of judgment, ego, and all of the labels that hold us back from what we all truly are- children of this incredible World.  I sit in awe of the exquisite beauty that we share.  I am honored to witness our yoga community come together and support each other in the ultimate quest to set aside our tasks and come back home to source.  If you're ever feeling lost in the busyness, remember you've got friends in yoga!

Thank You

May is an extra special month because it marks my 4th year of teaching yoga.  Some of you have been taking classes with me for all four years.  Some of you are newer students, but instantly took to the practice, just as I did, and I see you 2+ times a week!  It's so rewarding to see your progress.  I appreciate your openness and willingness to share your lives with me.  It makes what I do so rewarding.  Your friendship and fierce honesty touches my heart more than you know.  I am constantly inspired by all of you and it fuels me to live truthfully and authentically.  May 2nd will mark my 200th day of practicing hatha yoga every day.  I know that some of you have taken on the same goal of practicing daily and am so proud of all your accomplishments in yoga and beyond.  As you know, yoga is not just a physical practice.  It's a lifestyle that affects your habits, relationships and daily choices.  With the knowing that we are all one, we either contribute to the healing of our planet or it's destruction.  Living well is not necessarily easy, but the feeling that coincides with making mindful choices is priceless.  We have a great community of dedicated yogis here in the Lehigh Valley.  Remember that you are not alone.  Thank your for inspiring me to be a better practitioner and teacher.  

Love & Playfulness!

I played an April Fool’s joke on our teacher trainees at the Yoga Loft today! I have never been the one to play the joke on April 1st and I was reminded today of how fun it is to be silly and spontaneous. I think many of us feel safe being in control, so whenever I adapt a sense of play, it feels like letting go, which is what we’re always talking about doing in yoga! And strangely, it’s the brief moments when I accept how little I actually have control over that I feel the greatest sense of relief. Life presents a series of twists and turns that we can’t foresee and it’s certainly not convenient, but the blessing in disguise is our inevitable growth. What if every single thing that's happened in our lives was a necessary occurrence to assist in our soul's transformation? I whole-heartedly believe this because it reflects who we are today. And who we are today is beautiful! Every second we have on this Earth is an opportunity to let go of fear, shame, guilt, and the need to control so that we can welcome love & playfulness. Trust that all is unfolding as it will & enjoy your sacred life!

Asking for Transformation

When we make the conscious decision to commit ourselves to a consistent yoga practice, many of us are asking for one thing: Transformation. We are asking for the opportunity to rediscover the magnificent beauty that already exists within us so we may live our highest truths. Transformation cannot occur without some heartache or suffering somewhere along the path. It's precisely how we deal with conflict that determines our ability to evolve. My entire family was put to the test last week. My mom was diagnosed with Viral Encephalitis, an infection in the brain. The inflammation caused her brain waves to slow down dramatically, which resulted in severe cognitive issues- memory loss, a difficult time finding words, etc. The beginning of this journey was very scary, but she is now expected to make a full recovery. Last week, when so much was still unknown, the only thing that brought me any peace was my yoga practice. Every movement and breath was dedicated to the healing of my mother.

When we set an intention and give our yoga practice purpose, we may choose to extend positivity to one person, but that unique expression of love spreads outward to everyone that needs to heal. Directing energy is a form of service. I know that all of your positive thoughts have and will contribute to the speedy recovery of my mother and the ultimate healing of our family. This experience empowered my father and I to re-examine our priorities, tell major truths, and allowed my mother the time and space for an emotional awakening! My family is now stronger than ever before and we are all overflowing with gratitude. I asked for transformation and received an amazing blessing in disguise. Never take this life or the ones you love for granted. It can all change in an instant, and change is a sure thing.